Disclaimer: Let me start this post by saying that I am not a doctor or medical professional. I cannot diagnose you or your child, and I cannot honestly tell you whether you should use medications in treating ADHD or other common medical issues associated with neurodiversity.
The last two weeks have been tough. We’re riding the medicine change rollercoaster. I know there are a few people out there ready to “parent shame” me for using medication to help my child with ADHD, but if you’re reading this, you’re probably like most parents just trying to figure out how to help your child function in daily life and fearing that the next step will hurt your child.
You’re in the right place. Medications are just one of many tools to treat certain issues related to neurodiversity. Let me share a few of the tools I use to help my kids and address the myths that too many people believe.
The Truth
There is no medical treatment to “cure” ADHD, autism, or any other form of neurodivergent thinking. There is no magic pill that will suddenly make you or your child “normal”. I put those words in quotes for emphasis. I have actually had parents of my students make comments like, “I just want my kid to act normal” or “Maybe the doctor can give him (Name of medication) so he won’t have ADHD any more”. It just doesn’t work like that.
There are certain issues that are often associated with neurodivergent thinking like the inability to concentrate, mood swings, depression, anxiety, and so on that can be treated with medication. The medications do not take away the condition, and they don’t change the way a neurodivergent thinker thinks.
I know this truth is much more widely known today than it was 10 or more years ago when the above comments were made by parents, but we need to keep the message clear. Neurodiversity is not a disease and there is no cure. Medications are just one of many tools that can help neurodivergent thinkers with certain problem areas that affect their lives.
Tools In Your Toolbox
Diet and exercise are the first tools to put in your toolbox. Personally, I know some parents who have helped improve their child’s concentration and energy level through diet and exercise. I think that’s wonderful, and I encourage all parents to start there. I did. What I discovered was that caffeine (in small doses) actually helped my daughter concentrate. This is surprisingly very common in people with ADHD.
Outside resources such as occupational therapy, behavior therapy, and play therapy are other tools that have benefited some kids based on the specific needs. There are also a lot of ways these different types of therapies can help encourage our kids to be mindful, focus on a task, communicate needs, or behave in positive and productive ways.
Technology
Technology is one of those tools that can help or hurt depending on how you use it. There are too many apps to count that are designed to keep you organized. Pomodoro is a fancy name for a timer that is designed to break your work time up into small segments. That’s the short explanation. Both my kids love the Pomodoro app called Focus Dog right now, which helps them keep up with their time and focus on a specific task to feed their cartoon dog special donuts.. Of course, there are other visual timers and as well as visual schedules, mindfulness apps, visual communication boards, and many more.
One word of caution though, I recently saw an ad for a game app that could “cure ADHD”. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. Stay focused on looking for tools.
The Stigma of Medication
Medications are the tool that many people don’t want to talk about, or if they do, they have a strong opinion. Sometimes medications make things worse or create new problems. I think that’s the number 1 fear of most parents when they’re trying to make decisions about their kids. Every one of us want what’s best for our kid. We hear the horror stories about side effects. We feel like we’re failing as a parent. And there’s always someone to corner you in the grocery store to tell you all about the natural remedy that works for them and insist it will work for you too. I think we’ve all been there.
In the How to ADHD video below, Jessica dives in to some of the stigma around taking medication to help with concentration and addresses a few of those issues. Medications for depression, anxiety, and some of the other issues neurodivergent kids experience carry many of the same stigmas.
So How Did I Decide
About a year after the car accident (23 years ago) where I received a head injury and which triggered chronic pain, I started using antidepressants to combat the depression and anxiety that often goes with both of those issues. I’ve ridden the medication change roller coaster myself a few times with all its mood swings and side effects. It wasn’t my first choice, but it has helped me work, take care of my family, and enjoy life in general for many years.
I started seeing signs of ADHD in my daughter in preschool and kindergarten. We spent most of her first grade year experimenting with diet, exercise, teaching positive coping behaviors, and using tools like visual timers and menus. I pulled out all my “teacher tricks” that I used with my students who had ADHD.
By the end of the school year, it was obvious that she needed more help with concentration and impulse control than I could offer “naturally”. Her doctor suggested trying medication for a few weeks because stimulant medications often only help with these issues in people with ADHD. The difference was obvious within the first week, and my daughter even told me that she felt better because her brain had slowed down.
Quality of Life
That answered the most important question for me. The medications improve her quality of life. It can take trying several medications before finding the one that works best with the fewest side effect. That’s the rollercoaster ride we’re on now.
To those of you riding this rollercoaster too, just hang in there. You’re not alone. Take a deep breath before getting sucked into their arguments and mood swings. We give ourselves grace on the hard days. Extending that grace to our kids is a gift.
No parent shaming in the comments, but if you’d like to leave a comment about other tools that have worked for you or ways you’ve been able to navigate medicine changes, I’d love to hear them below.
How Tod ADHD: Medications
Focus Dog for iOS
Focus Dog for Android
Use Focus Dog Code iykpf will get you started with a few coins!